 
   E 'being in the Marche, an awareness campaign with a theme of violence against women, entitled   "The forms of violence,   the void of silence, the life of words  ".  
  This is a project You go in Ancona,  March 8,  and ending on November 25   in Urbino (at the end of post I will write all the dates for those interested to participate) is 
  speaks of "forms", because you chose to plant a dramatic event of great emotional power, despite its simplicity. 
 The    March 12, Piazza Manni Senigallia was filled with 100 figures   that called for height (real) and form (human figures) of women who, according to the color of the box: orange  : [ life of words], or purple     [The vacuum of silence], have survived or not following the abuse. Hundred symbolic presence of Lives ... symbolic but physically represented. 
  A crowd of thoughts and pain to cross on foot or by bicycle, by reading about each of these boxes, summarized in a few lines, the fate of women they represent. None of the passers-by,  per attento o distratto che sia, sembra indifferente. Osservando i loro volti si scorge una specie di curiosità, di smarrimento, forse per via di frasi tipo "  All'improvviso un giorno, dopo anni di convivenza....".   Anch' io me lo sono chiesta: Qual'è questo giorno fatidico in cui un tuo conoscente si mostra davvero per quel che è? Forse egli stesso non si conosce ancora a fondo, forse sarà per entrambi una brutta sorpresa, ma quel che conta è saper reagire, e questo potrebbe spiegare lo sgomento del passante, me inclusa. Saper reagire non è cosa da tutti, ed è molto più facile se non si è emotivamente coinvolti. "L'affetto" è stato spesso l'anello di congiunzione between these women and death. But that affection? To whom? I think the title of the book Concita De Gregorio  "Malamore"  that tells the distortions of this word so overused and often completely empty as well as potentially self-defeating. 
  "I am the victim and the executioner," Baudelaire wrote a poem that he wanted to emphasize the irresolvable coexistence of good and evil in everyone, yet there is a capacity for self-control. When will this be cheaper? What moves a hand to kill a person? I can not understand it. I have never lived such a temptation, even in moments of anger toward someone. Fortunately, I tell myself. I wonder 
   anche, cosa spinga una donna a rimanere tanto sotto il giogo della sottomissione, nell'umiliazione, nel dolore fisico, quando basterebbe scappare via. La risposta sta nei meccanismi che generano la paura, e ricordo di averne capito parecchio leggendo: "Se questo è un uomo" di Primo Levi. Certo, il tema è diverso...ma poi quanto diverso? Nei campi di concentramento c'era gente debole e senza diritti in balia di altra gente, forte e in divisa, che si arrogava il diritto di mettere fine alle vite che avevano iniziato ad ammazzare già dal principio, togliendo loro i vestiti in cambio di divise a righe, tagliando loro i capelli, costringendoli a mostrarsi nudi di fronte a tutti gli altri, trattanodoli come bestie per  giorni e giorni, finché lo sguardo perdeva la sua fierezza e si abbassava per evitare la morte, o anche solo per rimandarla di un giorno. Ovviamente è un paragone azzardato, eppure... Succedono cose atroci all'interno di certe pareti domestiche, e la paura è un sentimento paralizzante che si appiccica addoso a chi un giorno si sveglia e scopre che l' uomo che gli dorme vicino, in un momento di fredda lucidità si è ricordato che tanti secoli fa è stato una bestia, e che bestia vuole tornare.  
   A casa non si è in guerra, in teoria si è "in amore", in armonia quanto meno, e allora lo sgomento, la sorpresa, il senso di tradimento, immagino che siano ampliati oltre  ogni possibile comprensione per chi questo inferno non lo vive di persona. Immagino che la mente vada in confusione e che riemergano memorie "storiche" circa i comportamenti remissivi delle nostre antenate, e parlo di realtà durate secoli e secoli, per altro ancora raccomandate da certe religioni che, per diverse che siano, bisogna riconoscerlo, su un punto sono tutte allineate, cioè sulla necessaria inferiorità della donna, la sua sottomissione. Giorni fa nella trasmissione di Daria Bignardi   "Le invasioni barbariche"   una tizia di cui ho rimosso il nome per radicale indisposizione nei suoi confronti, è andata a presentare un libro in cui dice che la donna deve tornare ad accettare il suo ruolo di "sottomissione" che significa just stay below the base that is ...! My mother ... if I think part of me hives! 
  Walking among these shapes I thought I would have had no luck. There was perhaps an episode in my life that could have led to such extremes, there was some "flash" warning that I have been able to catch and then go away just a second before you overdo it and ... still seems to me that lightning still sti have arrived too late, that's the price you pay for life and if you have a good memory, memory "visual". 
  
  upstream of each report is ... a mirror. 
  happens to look the other  qualcosa che dietro la maschera del tanto inflazionato "amore", altro non è che lo specchio dell' auto-stima che si possiede, e l'autostima, in gran parte, deriva da quello che sei stato da piccolo, da come ti hanno insegnato a vederti allo specchio, da quel che ti hanno insegnato ad aspettarti da te stesso e dagli altri. Un fatto molto complesso dunque, e credo che incontrare qualcuno, incontrarlo per davvero, dipenda da due fattori: Il caso, e la fortuna. Occorre una percentuale di fortuna negli incontri, e quindi il caso, ma anche una dose di buon senso, una mente limpida e non inquinata da idee vecchie eppure sempre attuali che, dalla religione al marketing, si ostinano a stritolare la femminilità, pretendendo che sia sempre "altro" itself. The violence is more painful than physical, but also a psychological one has its specific weight and specific consequences, not to mention that almost always precedes the latter first. 
  The most obvious result, when you're slapped or beaten up, is that your dignity slowly dies, like that famous poem by the tone in my opinion a bit 'too noble and detached from practical life. Losing dignity is the worst that can happen to anyone, why and how the constitution. A set of values \u200b\u200bwhich underpin the whole being. 
  This idea promoted by original and incisive Marche region, made me think of the painter Georgia O'Keeffe   who painted big flowers because he wanted to somehow force the casual eye to bring attention to a particular nature that stubbornly ignore. Similarly, these shapes have materialized, though symbolically, something that on the one hand there tarpina day and night away in the form of TG and anything else crime news (and on the show), and on the other, however, there has always the illusion that things happen only to others, away from us, and is almost never the case. 
  Years ago in college in Urbino, I saw a guy who got slapped the   sua   ragazza con una violenza spaventosa. Era vicino la mensa, un punto di passaggio, e nessuno ha detto nulla. Lei era seduta in un angolo, spaventatissima, lui arrogante, come una bestia, non temeva nessuno, anzi...si sentiva forte, e io mi sono odiata per non aver fatto niente. 
   L’argomento insomma, non mi è indifferente. 
   Non sapevo della manifestazione, l’ho scoperta per caso, e attraversando questa piazza piena di spettri colorati, ho chiesto informazioni sul senso del tutto, così mi sono trovata coinvolta in un progetto di lettura di testi “a tema”.  Quando una signora mi ha detto di “tagliare” delle parti qualora il pezzo I chose was too long, I discovered that the association marathon / read, I do not really like it. I think the meaning of words is not to run, but to "come", and a 3-page story, everything is functional to the goal, or so it says, or is silent, and cut just to read some plot in the most , seems a bit 'stupid. 
  before I had three folders full of papers to choose from, from Prentice Hall, through Dante and his Divine Comedy, or the acclaimed Dacia Maraini, until evidence of processes and facts of record, but I chose (I do not know Who chose whom) a tale of  Concita De Gregorio,   entitled "Dalia",  excerpt from his book  Malamore , and I pretended not to cut even a comma, or I would not read at all. Send me the brain has caught the first lines. From the title I would say that in a roundabout way and opposed to violence, someone reminded me that I want very well. 
  This story about a little girl of twelve who is forced into the sex trade. There is 
  said his country of origin, but you can guess  "To you who live in town houses will look like a shack, I know that the so-called because our homes: cabins."  There is said the name of the girl's mother, we sense that only prostitutes and that at some point, does not come back home. The grandmother know that she is the breadwinner, we know that is old and has skin smooth and healthy, and understand at the end of the story that error would be cut short because of two words. This family is composed of women only :  "My father did not know who he is, there never was a man of our house."  We are brothers, but they are still small, and it is almost paradoxical, given the role of the opposite sex on the life of Dalia and his mother. One of the reasons I like this story is that ' author does not mention anything explicitly sexual. No detail "practical". It just says: "There is nothing to  raccontare.Era same every day.  Horrible" and resumed towards the end  " not want to talk to anyone about what happened .  Yet his words tell a lot more of those highly detailed lists of poses and cruelties, which sometimes border on a sadistic voyeurism, I think, and link to the "mercy", which is what the character of this tale does not want. She just wants you to hear his story, because it could be ours. It tells in an exemplary way, I think, the mood of identity theft against a little girl betrayed by her grandmother  "... I was scared, but my grandmother is always the grandmother ... and I was his queen " and" great "that tell stories about kings and queens, but then I treat you like meat counter, be bought and sold a kilo and then slaughtered when they are hungry. 
  understand that beauty is a source of men 'attraction, Dalia advantage of a "small" and ugly incident to stop being so desirable. It works! Free at last to die or to return to casa.Chi read some book about eating disorders, or experienced them in person, will see extraordinary psychological associations between these mechanisms. Abbruttire, mortifying the body to stop to be desired. People with bulimia often are cut, wound (and the recent film  "black swan"  shows him on several occasions), perhaps for other reasons, but it is a self-destruct mechanism. Paradoxically, in the story, the self-destruction is the only thing that can save Dalia, who, as she points out, has the name, a noun thought for a flower, a flower "sickly" would Baudelaire who works as a poet, transformed Gold in the mud, making what poetry is not poetry. Dalia in her own way, is a genuine form of poetry. Pure spite of everything. We know of 12 years and the salute to 23, when you know the old and ugly. What will happen in his life when trying to be like everyone else? This does not tell anyone. We know only that "now" head of household is a male, the brother of fourteen, and decide we do not know how to behave with her sister. We also know that she will bear evidence that his body, despite everything, the desire to know sooner or later, but is unlikely to be satisfied, because in the world of beauty as an absolute value, consumed as a woman she will be forced to large wilderness or maybe out of luck. You do not know. I've seen in a transmission, the woman who was once the girl immortalized as she ran naked and crying during the explosion in Hiroshima. A kind of symbol too, of violence if we want ... more "democratic", which has damaged and killed men, women, children and vegetation. All the injured have been damaged. This woman, in her small, even though his skin was destroyed and the incredible suffering, has become a family and seems calm, despite everything. Really, you can never say, but certainly we can and we must wish. 
  But returning to the subject of the blog, read in public, to give voice to a "any" Concita De Gregorio, author of a story so intense, and find myself in an almost surreal, between spectators and audience of the flesh of orange and purple paper, has had a cathartic effect on me. I heard my voice come out from his lips and tell a story, well aware that it was not just "a story", but the testimony of something that happens every day, in every corner of the world, even in our Italy advanced and civilized that sometimes seems full-time workers in a cross back across, toward regression, bestializzazione. An 'that Italy has learned to cling to some of the unfortunate victims as does the hyena now rotting on the body, taste for the macabre, blood, disgusting detail that was once the delight of the spectators at the Colosseum, or squares in which the French heads cut off at a rapid pace. 
    The terrible news is that this year, as opposed to how many viewers are tempted to believe, not only Yara and Sarah died, but many other people .    It 'just talk about it, but show it is a sacrilege, because it denotes a lack of humanity, compassion     and even compared to all others who have gone dead silent  . Dalia does not want the pity when he tells us its history, in "cases of television" like that of Sarah and Yara, it is necessary. 
  The blame I think the viewer. I dream of a world in which the third episode of "deepening" of the color patches of blood on the shirt of the girl, the whole country off the television, instead of sitting there listening to the mountains of hot air. They are not the journalists or commentators who arrive at the truth, it's not their job. They must talk about current events, and not just crime. 
  My theory is always talking about the news, people get used to being afraid, then be more willing to be controlled by a strong power. But fear of whom? Here are some percentages presented in this event and I want to also bring in your blog, just to figure ... 
  Violence against women in Italy.  Physical violence:
6milioni 743 000 women between 16 and 70 years have suffered physical violence during their lifetime.
5 million of them have suffered sexual violence.
psychological violence.
7 million and 134 thousand women were victims or victims of psychological violence.
46.7% isolation or attempted isolation
control 40.7% 30.7% 23.8% economic violence
devaluation
7.8% intimidation
Stalking the stalker
4 thousand 121 complaints, of which 723 were arrested.
victims are men and 19.1% for 80, 1% women.
2 million 77 thousand women were victims of persecution behavior.
perpetrators:
70% partner
acquaintances
17% 6% strangers.
 According to these statistics, which speak only of the reported cases, it seems that the worst enemies of clothes in our house, sleep in our bed or nearby. Only 6% of the violence comes from strangers. Let me be clear .... not I'm saying it's not serious, just that sometimes I feel that the facts strumentalizzino to foment intolerance towards the others, and I do not need it ... because it grows out of proportion without stress. 
 Carry a letter to the board displayed during the event:
NOT 'TRUE THAT ...
is not true that the phenomenon of family violence is limited, but is a widespread phenomenon, though still submerged, and then underestimated.
is not true that relates to the most disadvantaged social groups, with income and low educational level , instead it is a phenomenon that knows no difference across age, wealth and cultural level.
is not true that violence is mainly directed foreign communities, instead persente is in every culture, not only among immigrants and minorities.
is not true that is caused by momentary loss of control , however, in most cases it is a premeditated act of violence.
is not true that "the victims have done something to deserve it," instead the use of violence towards their partner can not be justified by any kind of behavior.
is not true that women experiencing violence like to be beaten, or they should be home, but it's difficult for women to stop the situation for fear of violence, economic dependence, isolation and social disapproval.
is not true that men are violent alcoholics, drug addicts, or people with psychiatric problems, instead is just a way to divert the issue, confining it to cases that concern the other, a way to find a justification to abuse do not have.
is not true that sexual violence is for the most part carried out by strangers , instead is most often committed by family members and acquaintances.
It is true that "wash their dirty linen at home" instead is essential that the violence come to light and that women should seek external help.
And among these there are various external aid, including shelters.
These points of reference for people who need help or more information, please
In Ancona:
http://www.lagemma.org/ .
E mail: casarifugio@lagemma.org
Tel: 071 / 2075383
Cell: 335 / 7681975
But also:
Association of Women and Justice - Via Cialdini No. 24 / A
Da lun a ven ore 09:00/12:00
Pomeriggio: solo mar-merc ore 17:00- 19:00
Ven: servizio telefonico.
N° verde 80032810
Tel 071/205376
E mail: donne.giustizia@libero.it
A Pesaro:
Parla con noi - Via Diaz n° 10 (merc. Ore 8:30-12:30) (Giovedi. Ore 16:00-18:00)
Tel: 0721-639014
www.eurogiovani.provincia.it
E mail: parlaconnoi@provincia.ps.it
http://www.laprovinciadelledonne.it/ .
A Macerata:
Centro SOS donna –Piazza Veneto 14 (S John) (3:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. Hours Wed-Thurs)
Tel: 0733/1990133
E mail: sosdonna@provincia.mc.it
to stop:
Sant'Elpidio to sea. Piazza Marconi 14
Mon-Wed-Thu-Fri: 09:30-13
Afternoon: 14:30 to 17:30 Wed
No. Green 800 215 809 (24 hours out of 24)
E mail: percorsidonna @ ontheroadonlus.it
At Ascoli Piceno:
Counseling ASUR-Via Torino 4
Wed 16:30 / 18:30
green No.: 800021314 (24 hours out of 24)
Tel: 0736 / 358 915 (open door)
E-mail: @ centroviolenza.ap alice.it
S. Benedetto del Tronto
Health District Asur via Romagna 12-Mar-Lu 7
hours 10:00 to 12:00 Mon-Tue-Thu-Fri-only afternoon: 16:30 / 18:30 Saturday
pom. By appointment. Green
No. 800021314 (24 hours out of 24) E Mail
centroantiviolenza.ap @ alice.it
Other links of interest:
http://www.regione.marche.it/
http://www.pariopportunità.regione.marche.it/
http://www.donne.marche.it/
http://www.pariopportunità.marche.it/
dates :
March 8 Ancona Piazza Roma
March 12 Senigallia Piazza Manni
March 17 Castel di Lama Freedom Square
March 20 Fabbriano square of the town on March 27
Jesi Piazza della Repubblica. March 31
Without Piazza del Popolo.
April 2 S. Benedetto del Tronto Piazza Giorgini
Fermignano April 8 April 9 Piazza Garibaldi
Piazza del Popolo Ascoli Piceno
May 8 San Severino Marche Piazza del Popolo
May 20 Fano Piazza XX Settembre, Civitanova Marche
May 21 Largo Melvin Jones
June 4 Osimo Square Boccolini
October 1 Falconara Marittima Piazza Mazzini
October 8 Sant Elpidio a mare Piazza Matteotti
October 14 Recanati Piazza Giacomo Leopardi
October 16 Loreto Piazza della Madonna
November 12 Macerata Freedom Square
November 19 Pesaro Piazza del Popolo
November 25 Urbino Corso Garibaldi.
 
 
  
  
  
  
  
  
 